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How To Compromise After A Breakup

After an unwanted breakup you're willing to do just about anything to give the relationship another chance. Often it leads to compromises that you may later regret.

So how do you know which issues you can compromise on that won't lead to larger problems at a later date?

Preparation is key to making a wise decision. Don't wait until the compromise is presented to make your decision. Before discussing the issue with your ex, get out a piece of paper and write down what your most important issues are with the relationship.

Which problems absolutely need to be resolved before you can be comfortable and happy. When you write down your problems you can put them in better perspective and what seemed like a larger issue, suddenly doesn't seem that important.

Ask yourself, is this problem large enough that I'd rather have the relationship end as opposed to compromising. There will be very few problems that fall into that category.

After examining your issues that need to be resolved, you need to pull out another piece of paper and consider the issues your ex considers the most important.

People aren't always vocal about the larger issues even though you know what they are. It's very common for people to use a small issue to vent their frustrations about larger issues.

So you have to really get under the surface of smaller problems to find the larger issues. Take your partner's perspective. Why would this problem be so important to them?

It may seem like a small, insignificant issue to you. But if the problem was large enough for them to want to end the relationship it is very important to them. Respect how important it is to their happiness and try to avoid dismissing their feelings over a small problem as trivial.


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